Monday, January 30, 2006

this one's for timmy

if i cannot bring joy to you directly, the least i can do is point you in the direction of joy

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

another commercial that irks me

there's this one about wendy's dollar menu and the people keep referring to things as tho they are items on the menu. so like an $85 ticket is worth 85 frosties, or the girl makes "6 cheeseburgers an hour." but then the man tells his wife that she looks like a million chicken nuggets. but i'm assuming that you get about 4 or 5 chicken nuggets in your $1 order. so this man just told his wife that she looks like some fraction of a million dollars and i just think that's wrong b/c it's like you went out of your way to alter the phrase so that your wife looks less good than she would have looked if you had just said something normal. and that's not nice. i mean, at least do the math and tell your wife she looks like 4 million chicken nuggets.

i suppose this is just another example of why men are poorly-equipped to deal with women.

Monday, January 23, 2006

i need your help

as you probably know, i can't make a decision to save my life. actually, i know exactly what i am going to do, b/c i let decisions make themselves by failing to put in any effort towards the engagement of whatever the decision would/would not result in, effectively meaning that my inaction makes the decision. but i need you to tell me anyways.

so, on vacation, i decided that even tho my body has no business being in a two-piece swimsuit, some days it's ok, but more importantly, the bodies of approximately 90% of women out there wearing two-pieces have no business being in them. plus, my mom was buying the suit.

but i am going to aruba in a few weeks and i think that i should try to make my tummy smaller. now, i could put some effort into this. OR i could get that little thing that you see on TV where the vibrating gadget sits on your tummy and just makes you lose inches off your waste without any effort. BRILLIANT!

so: do you think i should invest in this gadget?

Thursday, January 19, 2006


i'm making no promises about future posts.


i mean, that was kinda funny. right?

new post

this goes out to those of you who keep checking to see if i've posted again.